Transcripts
This page is on the road to being a full list of transcripts from the show. ''Series 1'' * 01x01 - The Serpent's Tooth * 01x02 - Pain In The Class * 01x03 - Droit De Seigneur Ben * 01x04 - The Last Resort * 01x05 - Farewell To Alarms * 01x06 - Death and Ben Take A Policy * 01x07 - The Awkward Phrase * 01x08 - Much Ado About Ben ''Series 2'' * 02x01 - All Roads Lead To Ramon * 02x02 - The Unkindest Cut * 02x03 - Parisian Beauty * 02x04 - Trust Never Sleeps * 02x05 - Death and Ben Take A Holiday * 02x06 - Driving Miss Crazy * 02x07 - I Second That Emulsion * 02x08 - The Age of Romance * 02x09 - Get Cartier * 02x10 - 'Tis Pity She's A Whore * 02x11 - The Last Supper * 02x12 - Ben Wants To Be A Millionaire * 02x13 - Breakable ''Series 3'' * 03x01 - Absent Vixen, Cheeky Monkey * 03x02 - Shrink Rap * 03x03 - Desperately Squeaking Susan * 03x04 - Of Mice and Ben * 03x05 - Imperfect Strangers * 03x06 - The Second Greatest Story Ever Told * 03x07 - Waiting To Inhale * 03x08 - Misery * 03x09 - Auto Erotica * 03x10 - A Handful of Dust * 03x11 - The Lost Weekend * 03x12 - Ghosts * 03x13 - One Flew Out of The Cuckoo's Nest ''Series 4'' * 04x01 - Fitting Punishment * 04x02 - They Shoot Harpers, Don't They? * 04x03 - The Great Escape * 04x04 - Return of The Prodigal Prat * 04x05 - Owed To Susan * 04x06 - Deliverance * 04x07 - Blind Justice * 04x08 - Friday The 31st * 04x09 - Sitting Targets * 04x10 - Loco Parentis * 04x11 - Canary Cage * 04x12 - May The Best Man Win * 04x13 - It's A Window-Filled Life ''Series 5'' * 05x01 - Reloaded * 05x02 - The Mummy Returns * 05x03 - You Don't Know Jack * 05x04 - What's Up, Docklands? * 05x05 - Luck Be A Lady Tonight * 05x06 - First Past The Post * 05x07 - My Will Be Done * 05x08 - My Fair Charlady * 05x09 - The Mouthtrap * 05x10 - While You Weren't Sleeping * 05x11 - Dentist To The Stars * 05x12 - A Wife Less Ordinary * 05x13 - The Book of Love * 05x14 - Going Dental ''Series 6'' * 06x01 - Bliss For Idiots * 06x02 - The Spokes Person * 06x03 - Dentally Unstable * 06x04 - Living The Dream * 06x05 - An Embarrassment of Susans * 06x06 - And Other Animals * 06x07 - The Art of Being Susan ''Series 7'' * 07x01 - The Ego Has Landed * 07x02 - Four Affairs and A Funeral * 07x03 - Once More With Feeling * 07x04 - Dutch Art and Dutch Courage * 07x05 - Susan of Troy * 07x06 - One of The Boys * 07x07 - Abi Ever After * 07x08 - Breaking Up Ain't Hard To Do * 07x09 - Life Begins At Fifty ''Series 8'' * 08x01 - The Parent Trap * 08x02 - Ben Wants To Be A Millionaire * 08x03 - Let's Not Be Heisty * 08x04 - The Wax Job * 08x05 - Neighbour Wars * 08x06 - Can't Get No Satisfaction * 08x07 - The Abi Habit ''Series 9'' * 09x01 - Bully For Ben * 09x02 - Bringing Up Janey * 09x03 - A Very Brief Encounter * 09x04 - The Psyche of Mikey * 09x05 - A Difficult Undertaking * 09x06 - Dog Dazed * 09x07 - It's Training Men * 09x08 - The Guru * 09x09 - Kenzo's Project ''Series 10'' * 10x01 - Wheelie Ben * 10x02 - The Son'll Come Out * 10x03 - Desperately Stalking Susan * 10x04 - The Melbourne Identity * 10x05 - He's Not Just That Into Ben * 10x06 - Slammertime * 10x07 - Ben Behaving Badly * 10x08 - Harper Vs Harper * 10x09 - Janey's Choice ''Series 11'' * 11x01 - Janey's Choice * 11x02 - A Night Out * 11x03 - Labour Pains * 11x04 - Accusin' Susan * 11x05 - Germs of Endearment * 11x06 - Harper Vs Harper * 11x07 - Relationship Happens * 11x08 - 'Booked * 11x09 - A Decent Proposal * 11x10 - Darts All, Folks * 11x11 - Susan For A Brusin' ''Specials'' * Special - Ding Dong Merrily ~ (2002 Christmas Special) * Special - Sixty Feet Under ~ (2003 Christmas Special) * Special - Glad Tidings We Bring ~ (2004 Christmas Special) * Special - The Erroneous Storm '' ~ (2005 Comic Relief Special)'' * Special - ...And I'll Cry If I Want To '' ~ (2005 Christmas Special)'' * Special - The Heart of Christmas ~ (2006 Christmas Special) * Special - Ho Ho No ~ (2007 Christmas Special) * Special - Have An Unhappy Christmas ~ (2008 Christmas Special) * Special - 2039: A Christmas Oddity ~ (2009 Christmas Special) *Special - Mary Christmas ~ (2010 Christmas Special) * Special - In the Nick of Time ~ (2011 Halloween Special) - (Transcript Only) * Special - The Last Christmas ~ (2011 Christmas Special) * Special - There's Snow Dinner at Christmas ~ (2012 Christmas Special) - (Transcript Only) ''Series Twelve: The Transcript Series'' Coming Soon Category:Episodes Category:Lists Category:Transcripts